Totally Insane

The world is collapsing, and I don't know anymore whether I crave it or am repulsed by it. My heart and head conclude differently. Am I going insane or am I a rational thinker in a world that's gone insane? I don't know anymore.

I can't be alone. After all, a segment of humanity has idolized a sadomasochistic demagogue leading them into the abyss. Rationality has no meaning anymore, if it ever did. The only explanation is that everyone yearns for pain - perhaps to feel alive. Or maybe to cut the knot tightened beyond reversal. What do you do when everything is beyond reach?

Red buttons everywhere. And they're being smashed like a toddler with a new plaything. No regard for consequences. No methodology or process. Just governance by emotion, hate, and retribution.

I went insane a week ago. It has provided me clarity. Before, I thought our division was between bourgeoisie and proletariat. Today, I see it's every man, woman and child for themselves. Throw out what you thought. Factions upon factions are forming, twisting the societal strata. Soon we may be observers, sidelined as power eats power.

Before, I thought there was rationality to the destruction. The pursuit of money and power. Today, it's clear they simply don't care. They want to accelerate the end game. No motive required. That's the clarity.

It's destruction for the sake of destruction. They desire the pain, as do I. It's a sickness and my heart knows better. But with the loss of control, there's nothing but despair, hatred and violence. Break the planet. Break the economy. Break society.

Smash! Smash! Smash! It's happening. It's madness but all perfectly rational in a collapsing civilization.